A Humble Pat On The Back Or A Warm Handshake
Article from Greater Kashmir
Appreciation is very essential to boost self confidence of an individual; it helps in reducing the most unwanted tension and bitterness which prevails in many relationships.
Madiha comes home after her day’s hardwork and painstakingly prepares delicious Zarda Pulaw to keep her parents-in-law happy. She wanted to develop a good relationship with them and anticipated a kind gesture from them in turn but all that her “Perfectionist” mother-in-law does is to count the number of cardamoms and cinnamons Madiha had used to flavor her special dish. Although she relishes the dish and licks her fingers but fails to say a word of appreciation for her daughter-in-law. The hurting incident leaves poor Madiha blue for days together and the taste of Zarda Pulaw gets lost in it. Little did her mother-in-law know that a little appreciation can spur the recipient onto greater achievements even while bringing a warm smile on her curious face and eventually warms up the cold air.
Little Mahi hops into the room waving her report card shouting “I have done it papa, I have stood first in the class” but papa, busy with his ledgers shoos her away with, “Can’t you see I am busy and don’t shout and don’t come to the room with those muddy shoes on”. Mahi’s little mind registers the hurt and she silently goes to her room. As a sort of retaliation, she gets angry- turns short tempered and stops studying well.
Similarly if a husband instead of saying a kind sympathic word cursing the insipid tea, spanking the “spoilt children” and only finding faults with the ways of the poor wife. Surely, these will shatter the beautiful relation between a husband-wife and ends up into a big disaster.
Little, insignificant incidents in day today life! Yet, the common factor, the missing link in the form of a kind word of appreciation, a humble pat on the back or a warm handshake, in short , a gesture of appreciation becomes the wet blanket playing havoc with self confidence, efficiency and even relationships in life. The reasons for the lack of expression are as varied as is ‘human nature’. If it is envy in one instance, it could be a perfectionist nature in another. If it is false pride in some which inhabits them from expressing their appreciation, it could be just plain indifference, jealousy and insensitivity in many others.
In real life, some sort of encouragement and appreciation does boost ones ego and provide the much needed self confidence essential for progress. After all, Mother Teresa or Lal Ded have been rather too few amidst us. Most of us are just ordinary mortals thriving on the approval and goodwill of those we love and with whom we live.
A gesture of appreciation is the least expensive of gifts that could be given to any individual, yet ironically enough, most of us are too stingy in gifting it.
Hopefully, I would get the most cherished gift from the esteemed readers in the form of a little bit of appreciation.
Thanks a lot.
Article from Greater Kashmir
